As an influential citizen, Ahmed’s* granddad deeply felt the shame and dishonour that his son had brought upon the family by turning away from traditional Uzbek values and traditions. He felt forced to cut ties with his son and daughter-in-law, while welcoming his grandchildren with the hope that they (his grandchildren) will reject their parents’ new faith.
Here’s Ahmed’s story:
“I love to visit my grandparents; they are always really nice to me. Whenever we go there, my brothers and I eat plov (rice) with lots of meat; we watch DVD’s and usually we have a great time. They live in a beautiful house, much larger than ours!
“Last time when I was there, my granddad asked me what we usually have for dinner at home. I told him that most of the time we have spaghetti. ‘With meat and sauce?’ he asked. I started to laugh. ‘No way, we never eat meat! It’s just plain spaghetti or sometimes just bread and tea!’
“Then my granddad told me that we would never eat spaghetti with meat and that we’d never have any pocket money so we could buy sweets or toys. I wondered why, so I asked him. He replied: ‘You can blame your dad! You will always be poor as a family, because your dad has betrayed us. He has left Islam; he no longer goes to the mosque to pray, so people have started to hate your dad. He lost the good job he had and it is not going to be easy for him to find another job. Well, no job, no money; no meat! It’s as simple as that, my boy!’
“When I came home, I was a bit confused. My dad asked me what was troubling me and I told him about my granddad’s biting remarks. So he sat me down with my two younger brothers and said, ‘Do you remember what I was like last year? Do you remember how I used to come home drunk every afternoon and used to shout at you and your mom and beat you?’
“We all nodded – yes, we certainly remembered! How could we forget? Once he even threw my two year old brother through the window of the house. Fortunately he didn’t break any bones, but how could we forget? All the shouting and fighting with my mom... How he would beat her every time he’d come home drunk. I was often upset and would cry myself to sleep.
“But by the end of last year we saw an incredible change in our dad. He had stopped drinking. When he comes home now, he doesn’t shout at us or my mother anymore, but even spends time with us. He is actually kind to her and sometimes even helps her with tasks in the house.
“My dad went on ‘Can you remember the time when I took you to the cemetery to pray? You were crying all the time and I was so frustrated. So at the cemetery, I asked a mullah to pray for you, but nothing helped. I was so desperate that I began to take drugs. I just wanted to kill myself. There seemed to be no solution, no one was able to help.
‘At that time one of my friends told me about the Gospel and began to pray for me. I had never heard about Jesus who died for me, who could forgive me all my wrongs and who could give me and my family peace. Then I started reading the Gospel... I accepted His invitation to belong to Him and two months later I stopped drinking – I completely lost the desire to drink. Then your mother saw that my conversion was more than just words and she accepted the Gospel as well.
‘And yes, you boys have seen that my life has changed. Yes, I have lost my job because I now believe in Jesus. Yes, your grandparents are mad at me because they feel I have betrayed them and destroyed the family’s reputation. Your granddad actually told me that I was no longer his son and that I am like a dead man to him. So, whatever happens to us, he is not going to help us, unless of course I return to Islam and give up my faith in Jesus. But I don’t want to do that; neither does your mom. Both of us want to follow the Lord Jesus.’
“For a moment my dad sat there quietly, as if he was thinking about the past and the pain he had inflicted on my mom and us. Then he looked at us and said, ‘It is not going to be easy for us as a family. We will probably always be poor and you may have problems at school because of your mother and I. And they may possibly not accept you into university either – simply because we are Christians.
‘But I’d like to ask you a question: Would you rather have the father you used to have before he met Jesus or the one you have now?’
“Spontaneously, all three of us cried out, ‘The one we have now!’ as we hugged our dad. ‘So, let’s face the problems together as a family, trusting the Lord Jesus to take care of us and to lead us,’ my dad said.”
Open Doors has many projects in Central Asia to provide some relief to new believers who have lost their jobs and the support of their extended family. By providing micro-credits, the ministry also assists in creating income so believers will be able to start a small business. This helps provide some income for the believers’ families and also finances for a house group or a church.
*Pseudonym
SourceOpen Doors May Newsletter